Scared of the Scars
You are still worth and worthy of loving and being loved!
I’m no longer afraid or ashamed to say that I’ve had my share of breakups and lost loves. While some of them still hurt in deep places I had forgotten about, they no longer stir up regrets of what if’s and if only’s.
Yes, I’ve had my share of mistakes in those romantic maelstroms, but thankfully (and hopefully) I believe and feel that through the pain and darkness, I have learned some necessary lessons to help lessen the pain and prepare me to be an even better companion whenever that special person appears. Which I hope and search for each day!
Yes, some days it’s more difficult to believe there is still a love out there for me, but seizing the date isn’t always about confidence and competence. sometimes it’s about not giving up, no matter how much it hurts, or seems impossible.
That being said, I’m also learning that in this day and age it’s not easy to date anymore. I’m not just talking about age as a genre or a number, I’m talking about how it seems so many people (especially those who have had their hearts broken—often more than once) choose to remain lonely because it seems safer than risking their heart in another relationship.
They refuse to reach out to those reaching out to them because they don’t trust that love is real, lasting, or worth it anymore. Not to mention all the counterfeits and scams people play as they prey on the hearts of the lonely.
I understand. And even when we do risk reaching out for love, we discover even more hurdles for our hearts to try and leap over or obstacles to navigate through.
We not only struggle to find someone, but in our fears and self-doubting we can be detoured and deceiving into believing that even if we did find someone wonderful and worth getting to know, why would they want to be with us when they see all the flaws and failures we have, just waiting to prove to them we’re not worth their time, or their love.
May I humbly and compassionately remind (not reprimand) you that we all have our scars. We all try to hide them because we’re afraid of what others will say, or even turn away.
We’ve all loved and failed, or fallen short of protecting and providing the love required to nurture, protect and improve our relationships.
We’ve all lost at great cost and therefore shouldn’t judge others, but be grateful that through the chaos of dating and creating relationships, we get to try again.
We are still worthy of someone’s love, including loving ourselves, no matter what we’ve been through, or who put us through it.
I’m not saying we need to brag about our scars, but I am saying that we should be grateful for them because each scar means we got a second (or third, fourth, etc.) chance at life and love. We’re still here and can find joy and love if we’ll allow ourselves to believe we are still worth being loved.
Ultimately, I hope we’ll stop being afraid of ourselves, our scars and of being scared of others and their scars.
Those who turn away, aren’t worthy of the price you paid for your scars. And those who love you anyway are a good place to find the love and companionship you are not only in need of, but are still worthy of in your life.
Whoever you are, may these words reach and reinforce your heart and your search for love. You are worth it! You are loved!
Nevertheless, don’t give up on finding that special someone who will truly see and love you for you—all of you.